24 ridiculous things I hope will never happen (soon)


Warning: contains (the band) Aqua.

All Hail The Monkey King

SEVERAL weeks ago, I wrote a list of things I wanted to achieve before I turned 24. Achievements  included capturing a drop bear, buying a toothbrush and partying with the Bundy Rum bear.

Even though I only have until early November to have a meaningful life – I haven’t fulfilled anything on the list.

So to help me feel better about myself, I am not going to try to cross things off the list.Instead, I’m going to write a more negative list which will suggest how much sci-fi fantasy has corrupted me. It will be a list of 24 things I hope will never happen.

Let’s begin:

1)  A respectable scientist (Stephen Hawking) announces that because of humanity’s irresponsibility to the environment, Drop Bears have become extinct. And that they are too dangerous to ever clone back to life.

2)      Hollywood producers (Universal Studios?) ask me if the Monkey King…

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