Love

It’s absorbing. Like travelling to another dimension – to a place that only really exists in the form of chemicals in one’s brain. It’s at once fantasy – an unreal spun into existence by mutual passion – and the only real thing there is. I have been in love. I remain in love – unreciprocated. Pain is not a stranger to me, yet I have met no greater agony than that of unreciprocated love.

It stalks the mind and deadens the heart, unreciprocated love. Though, the love remains, albeit one-sided, and sustains. It is still a reason to be happy. To have purpose. To be optimistic. Because true love is stronger than diamonds. Only death can defeat it and, even then, it will echo into history no matter how short its mutual manifestation.

Love is feeling no greater pleasure at the slightest touch with a lover. It is admiring them as something more perfect than one’s wildest imagination could conjure. It is wanting to die to protect their life. Love is uncompromising, unflinching; eternal. It is the most beautiful, sweet-smelling, long-lived, and, sadly, rare flower in the universe.

It is the only reason to exist. Its absence makes one momentarily, in times of weakness, fantasise self-destruction. But, its permanence and resilience is such that it is the only permanence acceptable or possible. Love is life. Life is love. Neither can truly, honestly exist without the other.

Love is an absence of greed, jealousy, envy, deceit, superficiality. Such things can still exist, to one in love, but not between them and the person they love. Love is truth, which is literally undeniable. Love can be suppressed. Ignored. Abused. But it cannot be killed. It is immortal. All powerful. It does nothing but win, wait to win, or revel in its triumph for eternity.

I fought love, once. Considered myself unworthy. But all deserve love. Even the most evil. Because love is the ultimate force for good. Evil is not defeated by love – it is eradicated. There is evil in this world only where there is an absence of love. But not for long. Because love is patient as evil is earnest. The fickle fuel of evil, no matter how seemingly plentiful, will inevitably burn out – leaving nothing but love – finally, or necessarily urgently – in its wake.

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The Story

Everyone’s is different.

Unique.

They interweave like

A vine growing up

A brick wall.

The sun rises at once

For everyone.

But their day may

Start and end

At very different times.

Love flows along, between

The threads.

Misses some, spends different

Amounts of time in others.

No-one really knows

Anyone else’s story.

As no-one truly

Completely

Knows their own.

We have faith when we

Look

In someone’s eyes

That they are good and sincere

And trustworthy, until

We find they’re not.

Then we forgive them and

Give

Them a second chance.

Or our story leaves them and

Theirs ours.

Future interweaving of our

Vines left only to chance.

Growing.

Withering.

Interweaving.

Dying.

So many stories of

Every genre and more.

As long as the sun

Shines and the water

Flows. Do we.

Growing Up

Is weariness at reality

Revealed slowly

Like a years long

Opening of a theatre

Curtain.

Born, excitement and anxiety.

Closed curtain.

Dim lighting.

Then glimpses of the

Set start to show.

A bent, crooked tree.

Full moon cloaked by

Cloud.

Music turns from cheery classical

To brooding baroque.

A figure here, there.

Shadows standing still.

A rusted car

Crumbling house.

Open now.

The tragedy begins.

Deep Water Beasts

Rise from nowhere

You Deep Water Beasts.

Emerge on shallow sand.

Obliterating humanity

Too near

Your frothing

Angry jaws.

Few can tame you.

Some can temporarily

Ride you bareback.

Stirruped with only

A plastic leash and

Foam wrapped in fibreglass

Covered in wax to keep

Your jaws open.

For a time.

Inevitably you collapse or

Collide

Into each other.

Limp to the shore

Then venture

Diminished

Back to deep water.

The rider grateful

Ecstatic to have tamed you

Punished you with the stirrup

Or pulled it deep

Into your snarling maw.

Then waits for more

Deep Water Beasts

To leash.

Dominate.

Before leaving your

Habitat

To spectate the spectacle

From safer, more familiar

Less rewarding land.

Abandoned

The years

Stretch out before me.

Like an arid

Empty

Lifeless land.

Featureless, bland.

Cold.

Without mountains to scale

Nor valleys to descend.

Nor even a horizon.

Nor colour.

White expanse ahead.

I look over my shoulder.

Colourful, eventful life

Retreats into the distance

Behind me.

I look ahead.

Back to the endless, three-dimensional

Blank page.

Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing, but then

A small black dot

Appears.

Growing larger.

Following colour into

Eternity.

Promising to take me

With it.

Changing climate

Wind rises.

Takes heat from the

Air.

Brings chop to the

Water.

So we wait

Exhausted.

But happy

Relaxed.

Expectant.

We eat

Rice and vegetables and white meat.

Smoking too many

Cheap cigarettes.

Contemptuous of

Death.

Resigned to it but

Sensing a comfortable distance.

The wind drops

Blows glass in its absence.

So we venture forth on

Foam and fibreglass and wax.

Or it doesn’t.

So we scoot north or south

Around rock impassable to the

Zephyr.

And hopefully not the

Waves.

We dine together.

From many places

In one for the moment.

Drink, play games, talk

Smoke too many

Cheap cigarettes.

Then go to sleep

With red sunset

Only

A recent memory.

In artificial air.

To the sound of white horses

Galloping over soaked sand.

Woken by sunrise

Bouncing off

Restless

Running white horses.

Sleek but wild

Without yet risen wind.

Watching a Storm

Over the Indian Ocean.

I realised nothing

Else

But that

Nature

Is oblivious.

To us.

Oblivious.

Cognizant.

We have a choice.

Yet we exercise

Oblivion.

When we should exercise

Cognizance.

And vice versa.

Sometimes.

Why.

Because we are

Selfish.

Because we are

Human.

Because we feel.

And think.

Oftentimes not at once.

So the choice

We have becomes

A choice we’ve already

Made.

Between humanity

And nature.

Cognizance

And oblivion.

Thought

And feeling.

The choice is an illusion

We tell ourselves is

Real.

When nothing is.

And everything is nothing.

Perceived otherwise.

Hallucinated.

Conveniently.

For the purposes of

Mere, animalistic

Survival.

Instead, sadly

Of higher, humanistic

Revival.

Perpetually or

If not.

Fatally.

Dying Flight

Clear my mind and send me flying
As I watch the afternoon sun dying.
Take me there to where I grow
Such heights as make all else seem low.
Don’t let me down until I tire
And set within my heart a fire.

Just lay with me it ain’t complicated
Pretend this moment’s long been fated
And radiate all your beauty.

‘Twas unexpected your appearance
Whirled inna my life like roulette chance.
Whirled out again oh-so-quickly
Made me unclean and demeanour prickly.
I did bury my life as if a black seed
Dug deep burdened by unconquered need.

May I have this dance m’lady fair?
Give me courage for a dragon’s lair
And radiate all your beauty.

I can’t remember the days before
When I must’ve yearned for so much more.
You were then somewhere not by my side
And my greatest concern ebb and flow of tide.
I’d sit in the water and stare out to sea
Subconsciously willing you near to me.

I don’t need you but that’s a lie
Be on the horizon ‘fore we die
And radiate all your beauty.

Pleasure explosion within your arms
Warm breeze the depths of winter charms.
But that’s all gone now swept away
‘N’ by our lonesomes we must now play.
I’ll be fine now ‘til the end of age
‘N’ return occasionally to our page.

As you can see I’ve accepted my plight
Cruel braids of fate I’ll no longer fight
I’ll remember all your beauty.

(November 22, 2009.)

No Regret

It is clear
I never want to see your tears.
You’re so dear
I’d like to destroy your fears.

You’re more precious than water
And so truly the Earth’s daughter.

Your stride is long
And you’ve steps of perfumed songs.
You fly so light
Across battlefields of admiring sights.

When you simply stop to drink
Men everywhere they pause and think.

You’re a child’s grin
And sweet music as a record spins.
Don’t look down
You make all men look as clowns.

I’ve never seen you claimed by rage
Only calm wisdom advanced your age.

A joyous laugh
My heart an earthquake on the graphs.
A stern gaze
Your eyes a pride of lions fazes.

Accept me please
But you leave and my heart freezes.
My love take
But you leave and my heart breaks.
And I wallow in a pit of knives.
And I indulge in crying days of five.
A river cries.
I fall from sky.

(December 21, 2009.)